Is There a Narcissist in your Life?
Is There a Narcissist in your Life? Do you feel less yourself, with less self-esteem, not trust your own memory? Although it is a rare condition you might be dealing with someone with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). A manipulative person who only thinks of themselves, their superiority/ specialness, their needs and how they appear to other people. This post deals with signs to look out for and explores why keeping them at arm’s length is the best idea!
If like me you are a big fan of Tik Tok. You most probably have discovered the “womb lands” saga. Boy meets girl unravelling into accusations of NPD on both sides. “Narc Tok” is a thing folks. It’s a trend right now and it seems to have stolen the limelight from psychopaths/ sociopaths (ASPD). I hope by the time you finish this post you’ll be cured of any fascination and armed with some useful knowledge.
Spotting a Narcissist
Are you working/ living with / dating or related to a narcissist? Do you recognize any of these traits?
. Charismatic and the life and soul of the party.
. A bully away from prying eyes.
. Needy, needy, needy for praise and attention.
. Feels they’re special, the best, regardless of reality.
. Entitled to whatever they want.
It’s a one way drain on your system. Essentially, they do have a persona where their personality should be and are incapable of giving back. It’s a one-way street where only their needs matter. They want control and have varied ways of achieving it
Narcissistic Methods of Control
Lying – Without a conscience it’s easy to lie to get your own way. There’s no pesky conscience getting in the way.
Coercive persuasion – Manipulating facts/ emotions to get someone to do what they want. Making some one stressed or anxious makes them easier to control.
Subtle control – using trigger phrases or words that bring people back to a malleable state. They may remind you of how you are supposed to react when they say “I’m disappointed”.
Gaslighting – You will be remembering things “incorrectly” and not taking their feelings into consideration. They will often blame the other person and accuse them of the behaviour that they themselves are guilty of.
Playing the victim:
The “Romantic” Narcissistic
This deserves a “Modern Warrior” inspired paragraph all of its own.
Here are the usual parts to an NPD romance
1. Love bombing, flattery a pretense of being your perfect partner. Good cop reels the partner in.
2. Second phase. All the above methods of control can be used! The ratio of good cop bad cop might start out 99% to 1%. The 1% bad increases and partners will stay around, at a price, believing the person they first met is the real deal.
3. Discard. Self-explanatory. When you no longer service a need you will be discarded / Orchestrate your own discard (Chelsea hart) and they will do their best to control how others see you.
4. Hoovering – he/she might come back when they have a need for something. They often believe that you still belong to them!
Here’s to healthy love true love | Welcome Hypnotherapy
The Truth about the Narcissist
Narcissists are very empty. They are all condemned to repeat the same predictable patterns of behaviour throughout their lives. Who and how they interact with others is never personal. An opportunity for attention/ manipulation/ advancement presented itself and they used that opportunity. A constant quest for external validation makes them very needy and dependent on other people. With egos of glass. Such fragile people can be prone to violent outbursts and obsession over perceived slights. Avoid!
Is There a Narcissist in your Life?
Narcissism is rare, around 1% of the population. You’ll be able to recognize them easily from the list of traits above. Just remember a parasite eats away at the host. Don’t be a host! In romantic relationships If someone strikes you as off / too good to be true then listen to your gut. NPD can’t add to the quality of your life. The great thing about Tik Tok is the “not interested” button just imagine you had one in real life and push it 😊
Author: Janet Adams
I am a qualified Hypnotherapist and Psychotherapist based in Belfast but offering treatments virtually as well.
Contact me to see if I can Help You.
Phone Number: +44 7952 345840
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