Listening for a Lighter Life – 6 Tips

Listening for a Lighter Life. You know the phrase “it’s good to talk” is ironically about the importance of being listened to. Having what we say valued is good for our mental health. Giving someone our attention/ being listened to is uplifting Not listening can lead us to make all sorts of assumptions and become anxious, irritated or even angry. Our brains survival mechanisms can result in a shoot first ask questions later reaction. Then comes the task of dealing with the fallout. Conversely, we can be on the receiving end of this from someone else’s seemingly out of the blue.

Listening gives us the chance to stay in intellectual control. To act without reacting. It’s a great tool for separating your stuff from someone else’s. You can return negativity to the sender unopened with a note of thanks but no thanks.  When we shift our focus, remain in control of ourselves, and listen to others it can make our and their lives richer, happier, more productive and ultimately lighter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Listening for a Lighter Life – 6 Tips

Listening for a Lighter Life – 6 Tips

Learning to listen better will bring its own rewards, more calmness, less drama and if you like drama then these posts are not for you!

6 Steps to No Drama and How Hypnotherapy Can Help | Welcome Hypnotherapy

Any small positive change will bring more rewards than we can see coming and help weed out people you really don’t want to take on board!

The next time someone wants to talk to you:

  • 1.Give them your attention. When you pay attention only to them, it makes them feel good, you’ll also understand them better. Focus, (put your phone down!) Relax, stay in the moment, listening to what they’re saying. Avoid letting your mind wander or thinking about what you’ll say next.

Listening for a Lighter Life – 6 Tips 3
  • 2.Make eye contact. Yes, it might be on Zoom. Failure to make eye contact can make it seem as though you aren’t paying any attention to the conversation. A lot of my clients find eye contact uncomfortable/ unnerving.  If you find that a problem, focus on just below one eyebrow. Not too much and not too little. Staring can seem aggressive. Not enough can come across as though you are just not that interested. Look away but focus again quickly.
  • 3.Wait until they’ve finished what they have to say. Sometimes people are just looking to get something off their chest. Let them finish. Sometimes just accepting what they have to say is enough to make them feel better.

    If that doesn’t seem the case, make sure you’ve understood, repeat what you just heard them say (in your own words). It will give the other person a chance to agree or explain more. Clearing up exactly what they are saying before jumping in with your own thoughts and views. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Listening for a Lighter Life – 6 Tips

Listening for a Lighter Life – 6 Tips

4.Ask questions. We are not mind readers and no 2 people view the world in the same way. Ask if you don’t fully understand. Appropriate questions signal we’re listening and trying to understand. Use what, how, when and where. They are much gentler ways to start a question than why. Why can sound aggressive and put people on the defensive.

 

 

5.Avoid interrupting. No one feels heard when they are interrupted, being talked over or heavens to Betsy, having the subject changed shows that you don’t value what they have to say. 

 

 

6.Remember Peoples own struggles are valid not put on a scale. If someone has a broken toe it’s no good telling them about a person you know with a broken leg and how they wish they’d a broken toe! We all deserve to be heard.

 Good sleep will make this all a lot easier! The Mental Health Benefits of Good Sleep (welcomehypnotherapy.co.uk)

 

 

Listening for a Lighter Life – 6 Tips

Listening for a Lighter Life

– 6 Tips

it can be rare in this day and age to feel listened to.  We tend to have a strong internal focus, dealing with a lot of our own problems stresses and anxieties. Feeling understood leads to connection. The more you authentically listen and are interested in others the more they will be willing to listen to you when you need support. Balance is vital. Little things do make a difference practicing these easy listening tips will help uplift others, avoid misunderstandings, give you the opportunity to be listened to in turn and improve your relationships.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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